Memory That Haunts
by KamiKaze Knight
Summary: Main Rahoon Yaa Na Rahoon... Tu Mujh Mein Kahi Baaki Rehnaa...


**Memory That Haunts**

….

''Abhijeet.''

Daya looked back at his best buddy whose steps were already slowed down upon reaching the forensic lab's gate. Daya waited for a second and then shaking his head a little disapprovingly he joined the rest of the team inside the lab leaving a slow paced Abhijeet behind.

Sr inspector Abhijeet looks down, shamed and broken. Every time he came here he made sure he wouldn't break down and yet every time he found his pace slowed down automatically. The smell of freshly brewed chemicals as soon as reached his nostrils took him back in his past. The environment of the lab and around it still held her memories in it. He wondered how it affected only him and not the other members. It felt like every inch of this place waited only for him to relish the memories on him as soon as he reached there.

**Main rahoon ya na rahoon**

**Tum mujh mein kahin baaki rehna**

**Mujhe nind ayein jo akhiri**

**Tum khwabo mein aate rehna**

He felt suffocated. Because these pleasant memories came with nightmares also. Nightmares, which he had every night now. Every time he came here with determination only to return with the same broken emotions. Every single time. Every single day.

**Bas etna hain tumse kehna**

**Bas etna hain tumse kehna**

Hands in pockets he entered into the lab with an impressive face. He tried to keep his eyes down but his eyes would always sneak around the lab to cherish the moments from past with every single opportunities they could get. And so within a few seconds his eyes were roaming from one shelf to another shelf of the lab. The colourful chemicals seemed mocking at his fate this time also. He looked away. That table, that desk, that microscope of her.

_*sometimes its so hard to manage these curls! They keep disturbing me all the while.*_

His eyes rested on the curly haired girl who had been appointed as Salunke sir's new lab assistant a month before. With all the concentration dedicated to the microscope she was hardly caring for her disturbing curls.

_*mere curls toh mano mujhse jayada tumhe disturb karte ho…*_

He took his eyes off of the new forensic expert immediately. Everything had been hard already and God had just planned to mock him at every steps.

He kept standing there silently behind the team members without a word. In between the conversation he could feel the gazes roaming on him but he decided not to acknowledge it. God damn! He wished that good lady forensic expert would stop staring him. It's so uncomfortable.

''Abhijeet,'' Dr salunke addressed him directly after the case conversation was over. "'Barey din bad ain. Aya karo yaar.''

Abhijeet smiled a little and nodded but didn't talk. Dr Salunke didn't force him either with further querries.

At time of leaving he was again the last one with slow hesitant speed. Trying his best to take every feelings related to this place with him he walked slowly. It's a different feeling all together again. Previously while leaving there used to be an urge to come back again. And now, there's a feeling that he might not come back ever if he could avoid. It made him to feel every bit of her existence more immensely, more urgently. It might be the very last time. It might be his very last chance.

Walking through the corridors reminded him the disturbing sounds of her high heels which used to follow him with speed to catch his pace. Sometimes to remind him their forgotten dates and sometimes to remind him his hospital schedules for dressings. Sometimes she would just shove some snacks into his hands and would disappear with same pace without uttering a single word.

**Kuch kahoon ya na kahoon**

**Tum mujhko sada sunte rehna**

He looked around. She still lived in this place, in this air, in this corridors. The smell of musty chemicals and corpse started to disappear as he reached near the Bureau. He let his breath out audibly. Yes, he had done it one more time.

**Bas etna hain tumse kehna**

**Bas etna hain tumse kehna**

''Abhijeet ke bare mein kya decision liya hain board ne?'' An anxious Salunke asked ACP later at that evening when the Bureau was almost completely deserted except the two of them.

''Abhitaq koi natije pohoch nahi pai hain.'' ACP scratched his forehead. ''Pata nahi salunke kabhi kabhi lagta hain kahi maine galat toh nahi kar diya use resign karne se rok ke… kahi main hi use uske atit mein bandhe toh nahi rakhta na.''

''Kya baat kar rahe ho boss… main toh kehta hu ki wo jo Bureau ata hain usi waja se wo ji raha hain.. orna kabka tut ke puri tarah se bikhar jata…''

''Bikhar toh wo ab bhi raha hain Salunke… or hamme se koi use sambhal nahi pa raha… ham use apne aap se dur hote dekh rahe hain or kuch nahi kar pa rahein hain.''

''Praduyman… wo thik hain… Yakeen mano mera. Kuch cheese, kuch waqt kabhi wapas nahi ata… hame unke bigar hi jina sikhna parta hain… jo Abhijeet kar raha hain..''

ACP nodded.

''Bus, uske transfer ke notice ajain… uska is sheher se kuch sal dur rehna hi thik hoga.'' Said ACP.

''Mujhe bhi yahi lagta hain.''

ACP looked down in pain. Salunke pressed his buddy's shoulder to comfort him.

''Daya..''

Daya was leaving the Bureau premise when a familiar Lady's voice stopped him.

''Oh Dr Nidhi aap… Abhitaq gain nahi aap?''

''Bas ja hi rahi hu.''

''Oh..okay.'' Daya smiled.

''Apse ek baat puchu agar bura na mane toh?''

''Haan.. kyu nahi.''

''baat actually apke dost ke bare mein hain.''

''Abhijeet?''

''Ji.''

''Uske bare mein kya puchna hain apko?''

''Bas… wo.. I mean unhe jab bhi dekhti hut oh lagta hain ki bohot dard mein hain wo. Or pata nahi kyu mera maan karta hain ki main unki wo dard batu… par wo dard bat na toh dur mujhe ajtaq nazar uthake dekha bhi nahi unhone. I mean, mujhe bohot weird sa feeling hota hain. Aj bhi jab wo lab mein ai… ek shabd taq nahi bola.''

''Dr Nidhi… unlogo ke dard ap kabhi nahi bat sakti jo jina hi dard mein chahte hain. Wo log apna dard kabhi nahi bat te kyuki unhe ye daar hota hain ki kahi unka wo dard kam na ho jain. Kahi dard kam ho gaya toh wo jienge keisey. Kuch log dard ko hi apna jine ka sahara man te hain.''

''Or un logo ke madat unke dost bhi nahi karte?''

Daya smiled ruefully.

''Nahi Dr Nidhi. Kyuki unke dost ko bhi ye samajh ajata hain ki dard ko sehna hi unke jine ki sahara bhi hain or maksad bhi.''

Dr Nidhi looked at Daya blank.

''Chalta hu.'' Said Daya. He turned around to leave but stopped hearing Nidhi's voice.

''Kya aap mujhe Dr tarika ki photo dekha sakte hain?''

''ap ko keisey pata?''

''Bas… bato bato mein Salunke sir ne aaj bata diya. Can you please show me her pic?''

Daya thought for a while and decided he should show her the pic. She should know why Abhijeet avoided her mere presence around him let alone looking at her. He fished out his phone from his pocket and after searching for a while he showed her Tarika's pic. Dr Nidhi took the phone in her hand and looked at the pic adorably.

First thing which took her attention was Tarika's curly hair which almost matched hers'. All on a sudden her smiled vanished. She felt an unknown guilt inside her. She felt a drop of tear gathering at the corner of her right eye. She decided to hide it. She gave the phone back to Daya.

''She's pretty.''

''She was.'' Daya smiled.

Dr Nidhi removed the tear drop from the corner of her eye and blinked for a few times. She's a very emotional person but crying over someone's grief whom she barely knew was very new to her.

''May be I remind him of her.''

''You do.'' Daya sighed and then looked up at the sky for a few seconds, ''actually Dr Nidhi you know what, yaad karne ke liye us chiz ko bhulna bhi jaruri hota hain. Or,'' Daya paused, sending back the tears in his eyes, ''wo kabhi bhulahi nahi usey in do salon mein. Kabhi bhi nahi.''

''Bohot lucky thi apki dost.'' Nidhi commented.

Daya nodded trying hard to give her a small smile.

''Chalti hu. Good night.''

''Night.''

Daya looked at the vast sky above him. The night was calm. And the calmer it used to be the louder it screamed for Abhijeet. Pocketing the keys of his car he decided to walk to his house that night. In a way to hear the unheard screams which his friend often heard.

The gate of the car got closed with a thud behind its owner as he got down from it.

Even after two years the heaviness in the air of this place had not worn off for him. And coming here every time felt like living his nightmares in reality, living that moment once again.

**Hawamein lipta hua main**

**Guzar jaunga tumko cchu ke**

_*''You know what? Logo ko taklif deke jinhe khushi milti hain unhe kya kehte hain? Sadist_.''

_''Haan toh main sadist thori hu. Mujhe logo ke taklif se bohot taklif hoti hain.''_

''_Tum sadist nahi, tum masochist ho. Khud ko taklif pohochake tumhe khushi hoti hain..''_

''_Arey Tarika ji.. ye kya baat hui_..*

The voices in his head faded away. He took his steps ahead to the railing of the bridge.

**Agar maan ho toh roklena**

**Theher jaunga in laboon pe**

_*''Sirf char mahina hua hain hamare shadi ke or tum toh aise behave karne lage ki abhi se bore ho gain mujhse!''_

_''Haan toh use pehle ki 10 saal joro na jo maine tumhare piche gawaye.''_

_''Acha! Shadi ke bad toh jawan tumhari bohot chabarchabar chalne lagi hain. Pehle toh Pa-pa se age hi nahi barta tha_.''*

The bridge's railing had been renewed. He wished everything could be rebuild or at least repent.

He looked down to the bridge. The moon was shining its reflection on black water. It's full moon today. It was full moon that day too.

**Main dikhu ya na dikhu**

**Tum mujhko mehsoos karna**

He felt the tightness in his chest as he felt his vision getting blurred at the same time.

_*''Wow Abhi! Dekho na ketna acha lag raha hain… tum na mujhe hamesha aise full moon pe long drive pe laoge.. okay? Promise?''*_

''I promise Tarika. I promise.'' Abhijeet promised for the thousandth time standing under the full moon.

*_''Abhiiiiiiiiiii… samne dekho.. samal ke_…… ''*

Everything once again got black in front of him like that day. Still he wished he wouldn't have woken up in hospital bed that day. He wouldn't have to teach himself to live everyday then.

He sat on the railing, looking at the moon.

**Bas etna hain tumse kehna**

**Bas etna hain tumse kehna**

*''_Aisa kya batana hain tumhe jo tum mujhe ghar pe nahi bata sakti… etne dur long drive pea ne ki kya jarurat thi!''_

''_Baat bohot special hain… sabra karo. Sabra ka faal mitha hota hain. Kahawat nahi suni ka?''*_

Abhijeet smiled for one last time before breaking into shades of tears.

_*''Mr Abhijeet, your wife was two months pregnant.''*_

Abhijeet made himself strong yet Once again.

''Yadoon ke bhubar mein ek yaad or sahi.. khone ki dastan mein ek khona or sahi…'' He remembered losing his mother, his sister like junior, Tasha. ''Log toh pate hi khone ke liye… jitey hain pane ke liye… main ji raha hu toh bas yaadon ke liye.''

His phone rang and he picked up.

''Kaha ho boss?''

''Jaha hona tha mujhe..''

''Car hain na?''

''Haan..''

''Mujhe lift de dena.''

Abhijeet cut the call without answering. The answer was not need after all those full moon's nights. He looked up at the moon, showering its lights all over the globe.

**Main rahoon ya na rahoon**

**Tum mujhe mein kahin baaki rehna**

_**AN: Its not a Birthday gift. It's a sorry gift. Its for you shadow Grey. Roya toh nahi na kisi ne parke? But hope ki sab ko dukh hua ho thoraaaaaa sa**… _

_Please keep loving and supporting Abhirika and abhirika writers. _


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